Sunday, 20 September 2009

Dari KB Ku Pohon Seribu Kemaafan

Alhamdulillah. Raya is closely approaching. Ibadah puasa kitani pun akhirnya lengkap. See you Ramadhan, welcome Syawal. Semua umat Islam gembira. Miskin kaya, tua muda, and not to mention, syaitan jua! Keluar dari lokap jua akhirnya. What, banar jua tu. Anyway, Bulan Syawal. What are you guys really look forward to time raya ani? Duit raya? Some of us at this age might still get it, some jadi tukang provide duit raya tia pulang. Pakai baju baru? Well, probably. Most of the case, cematu plang jua. But as for me, raya is more than that. Raya is the time kitani bermaaf-maafan. Susun sepuluh jari, salam orang tua kitani, our brothers and sisters, colleagues, friends and relatives, basically people around us.

Mengapa we are encouraged to forgive and forget time raya? It is because raya is a festive month celebrating penat lelah kitani berpuasa menahan lapar, dahaga and syahwat. So raya is designated to celebrate our victory menempuh semua dugaan atu with orang-orang yang kitani sayangi. Imagine celebrating raya bermasam mua. Inda jua best tu bui. I mean, that's my theory. But it makes sense right?? Of course forgiving is never easy. It takes great courage to do so. I admit, I myself still ada menyimpan perasaan dendam at some particular people for the wrongdoings that they had done to me which I think is unforgiveable.

I have mixed view of how I'm gonna see my raya this year. Meaningful, because alhamdulillah, I live to this day. During the fasting month, I went out for sungkai a lot of time with a lot of people. Sungkai with my RESCO colleagues, with my ex-SMSA mates as well as ex-St. Margaret friends and not to mention sama family and kekasih hati. Kupon pun banyak angus. Which makes me realise, I am surrounded and loved by so many great people. Apa membari nya ku iski kan raya. I also spent a night dalam bulan Ramadhan ani berqiamullail di masjid UBD with some UBD people which of course, I managed to make some friends with. Memang ngalih tapi ya Allah, bermakna rasa me. Up to this day, I really miss qiamullail. Mana inda, that was my first time berqiamullail di bulan Ramadhan. May Allah panjangkan umur ku so that aku dipertemukan lagi with such an experience.

Di bulan Syawal ani jua keiskian ku untuk beraya bertambah as I try to live up kembali trend mengirim kad raya yang sudah lama terkubur dek zaman IT ani. Thanks to my bro E-jat for giving me one. I love u as my brother and friend. Inda ramai kawan yang ku anggap sebagai abang ani. Lebih-lebih lagi aku nada abang. Terharu nya aku time kau bagi aku kad raya atu Allah saja yang tau. That's you in the picture!

Ramadhan ani jua quite a number of tragedies yang ku dangar. Orang kana baham buaya and a very good friend of mine, Allahyarhamah Raihana Hazwani meninggal dunia due to stroke just recently (al-Fatihah buat mu sahabat). So I suppose (which I think is a 110% guarantee) the families of the deceased akan menyambut raya tahun ani dengan penuh suram, more or less. Me, having also lost a good friend, of course ada merasa sedikit kehilangan. Which makes me feel like wanna limit myself from having too much fun this coming raya. All and all, such tragedies sedikit sebanyak ada jua membawa keinsafan and kesedaran. Orang selalu menasihatkan agar berhati-hati di jalan raya takut ada perkara yang inda diingini terjadi before and time raya ani. It turns out that Allah tries to tell us that kematian buleh terjadi dimana-mana and however He wants it to. Ya Allah, panjangkan lah umur ku serta orang di sekeliling ku, Amin.

To conclude this 'telampau-panjang-jua eh-buring-ku-membaca' post I would like to call upon my friends, mana-mana yang bermasam mua and bertegang urat sesama rakan seperjuangan atu, please do set that aside altogether. We jernihkan mana yang keruh, we start on a brand new page, all in the name of the month of Syawal, if not for me. I love you all my friends, you know who you are.

Seikhlas hati jua ingin ku memohon ampun dan maaf andai ku ada terkasar bahasa atau menyinggung perasaan sesiapa saja. Maklum, manusia, inda terlepas dari melakukan kesilapan. And pada yang pernah buat salah arah ku jua atu. Baaaah, apa lagi. Jangan ego, minta maaf tah jua! Ku maafkan plang udah ni, tapi still! xp <--kamu tau ni Hilmi, Hilman.

Dengan penuh hormat, cinta, kasih dan sayang,

Syaza Syazwan.